Thursday, June 17, 2010

Tears and Fears

What do you do when you wake up in the morning and your arm and hand are really, really swollen? I cried. And I am still crying. I'm sad because I am so sick of looking and feeling like a cancer patient. I'm mad because it is a beautiful summer day and I want to be able to enjoy it. I am afraid that I will never look and feel like I did before I heard the word cancer.

After crying my way through my devotions and asking God why this has happened to me, I chose to look at the blog of the high school mission trip that Kylie is on. The experiences that they are having and the words they use to describe their experiences are inspiring. Relating what they are doing rafting, caving, and repelling to my experience with cancer is so easy. They had to give all control to God because the river left them with no other choice. I have to give all control over to God because cancer leaves me with no other choice. They needed to stay alert so they could hear the instructions from the guide. Such great advice, stay alert and listen to God. In addition, they needed to use teamwork. The blogger mentions that if we do not surround ourselves with a godly group of people, we will struggle to stay on God's path. I want to thank each one of you for being a part of my team. For praying me through the rough days and encouraging me to listen to his instructions.

"For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord. Plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11


  1. Oh Robin, I am so sorry to hear your day started off so sad. I am glad though to hear the inspiration from the kids on the mission trip. Keep hanging in there, you're doing great! God loves you and He's with you and we are all with you!

    Love, Krystle

  2. Prayers and blessing for you Robin. I hope you can get out and enjoy the sunshine at least a little and that you have peace like a river. I'd love to take you to lunch soon. I'll call you soon. Lynn

  3. Hi Robin,
    I'm sorry that your arm is still bothering you. Maybe you need to drink more? Keep giving cancer the one-two punch. God loves you and He will not forsake you.Praying that you will feel His peace and healing. Glad to know that Kylie and the group are having so many marvelous experiences.

    Love from Annapolis,
    Sue & John

  4. I loved today's post. Such powerful words and insight from you. Remember, your cancer is furthering his Kingdom. Much love! Jodi

  5. I am so sad just thinking of what you're dealing with Robin. Still praying from afar... Love, Laurie

  6. I was just looking at thier pictures from repelling, WOW, and reading thier words, even more WOW! Praying for you Robin, I don't completely know how you feel, but trust me, I know that I want this Cancer word behind me FOREVER!

  7. Dear Robin,

    I'm so sorry you had such a rough day Thursday. I love the fact that you gain encouragement from reading the blog from the H.S. mission trip. Isn't it amazing how much we can learn from kids! :) Here is a verse I came across in my devotions..."The Lord is good, a strong refuge when trouble comes. He is close to those who trust in Him." Nahum 1:7. Praying non-stop for you!! Stay strong and rest in God's loving arms!

    Corla :)

  8. Robin,
    Thank you for your honesty. Cancer sucks, no doubt about it. And hopefully, having this kind of blog to vent those thoughts and feelings helps. Just take it one day at a time. One day, you WILL look and feel normal again. The reminders of cancer will always be with you, but my prayer is that they will become victory reminders of how you kicked cancer's butt.

  9. Dear Robin,
    I'm sending you strength and love,

  10. Hi Robin!
    Would love to get together with you soon.
    Love you lots,

  11. Hi Robin~ I'll be back home late Tuesday and would love to walk when you feel like it. Can't wait to see you! Love, Laurie :)

  12. Hi Robin,
    I'm praying your days get easier and you get to truly enjoy your time with you family in Alaska.